عشق به‌مثابه بلوغ مراقبتی نقدی بر نظریه مثلث عشق و ارائه رویکردی نوین به عشق در روابط زوجین

نوع مقاله : علمی - پژوهشی

نویسنده

هیئت علمی پژوهشگاه علوم انسانی و مطالعات فرهنگی

چکیده

نیاز به عشق، یکی از نیازهای حیاتی بشر و از مهم­ترین انگیزه­های تشکیل و تداوم خانواده است؛ اما به زعم متخصصان در کنار سایر عوامل، فهم نادرست از مفهوم «عشق»، این نهاد را در معرض تهدید قرار داده­است. هدف از این پژوهش ارائه نگاهی تحلیلی به ادراک رایج زوجین به مفهوم «عشق» در روابط زوجین، خصوصاً با تاکید بر نقد نظریۀ «مثلث عشق» استرنبرگ(1986) -بعنوان رویکرد رایج به مفهوم­سازی «عشق» نزد روان­شناسان و مشاوران ایرانی- است. در همین راستا با استعانت از رویکردهای نوکلاسیک و سه ظرفیتی ذهن، تعریف تفکر مراقبتی و مولفه­های آن، و همچنین ساختار شخصیت در نظریه تحلیل رفتار متقابل، رویکردی بدیل و جامع از «عشق پایدار» ارائه خواهیم داد تحت عنوان «عشق به­مثابه بلوغ مراقبتی». برای دستیابی به این هدف از روش پژوهش توصیفی، تحلیل مفهومی و تحلیل استنباطی  بهره گرفته­ایم. وجه تمایز اساسی این رویکرد با رویکردهای پیشینی که یا عشق را در جدال با عقل توصیف می­کنند، یا یکی ازاین دو را برده دیگری می­خوانند، و بطور کلی «عشق» را تحت جبر ناهشیار بشر تلقی می­کنند، در این حقیقت است که عشق منبعث از عقلانیت با هر سه ظرفیت شناختی، عاطفی و ارادی است و گرچه متاثر از الگوها و طرحواره­های ناهشیار می­باشد، اما پدیده­ای چندوجهی و انتخابی است. در این مقاله میان مفاهیم «عشق» و «شبهِ عشق» تمایز قایل می­شویم و با پیشنهاد رویکرد «هرم عشق» که دارای رأس «بلوغ مراقبتی» به معنای آگاهی دائمی نسبت به دلایل ایجاد و تداوم عشق می‎باشد، در پی ارائه تصویری کامل‎تر از معنای عشق حقیقی در روابط زوجین هستیم، عشقی که دارای ماهیت تحولی است و در هر مرحله از حیات خانواده با آگاهی از مضامین همان دوره، خود را تغذیه نموده و پایدار و شاداب بماند.

کلیدواژه‌ها

عنوان مقاله [English]

Love as Caring Maturity: A New Approach to Love in Couple’s Relationships based on the Critique of Sternberg's Theory

نویسنده [English]

  • mehrnoosh hedayati
faculty member IHCS
چکیده [English]

"Love" is one of the vital needs of humanity and one of the most important motivations for the family formation and its preservation. However, as mentioned by the experts, among other factors, a misunderstanding of the concept of “love” has put family at risk. The main goal of the present study is to provide an analytical overview of the concept of “love” in couple relationships, particularly by emphasizing on a criticism Sternberg’s theories (“love triangle" and "Love story”) and present a new approach: “Love as Caring Maturity". The method of the present qualitative research is based on the herméneutique and critical paradigm and the data deduced from literature review which were investigated using the thematic analysis approach. In this approach, based on neoclassical theories of rationality, "True love" is the product of rationality with all three cognitive, emotional, and intentional capacities, and although influenced by unconscious patterns and schemas, it is a multifaceted, selective phenomenon possessed by “adult ego state”. In this paper, a distinction is made between the concepts of “love” and “pseudo-love” and it is attempted to propose a more comprehensive picture of the meaning of true love in the relationships of couples by suggesting the “love pyramid” approach with a “caring maturity” vertex behind "tend to intimacy", "biological basics", and "decision to commitment". Research findings showed that the "Maturity" element has four domains of consciossness; and "Caring" element has three areas; and "Caring maturity" has five aspects.

کلیدواژه‌ها [English]

  • Love
  • Love Triangle
  • Maturity
  • Caring Maturity

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